Just got my best mate, my dog a cell phone plan.
It comes with roll-over minutes.

Eating 20 lemons was a bad punishment, but I kept going until the bitter end.

When my mate was diagnosed with terminal cancer, he took three ecstacy pills, one embossed with a '7', one with an '8' and one with a '9'.
His daze was numbered.

My wife left me because I like to play with Barbie.
She also insists that I call my stepdaughter by her full name- Barbara.

My son's become a professional DJ as of late. He's doing really well for himself, I'm just not sure about the kind of people he mixes with these days.