The doctor has told my wife that we have a high probability of having a cancer baby.
By my reckoning it's only one in twelve.

I got sacked from my job for complaining that all the calendars are a year behind for the third year running.
Apparently, I wasn't intelligent enough to work at the Calendar Recycling Factory.

CALENDAR FACT: All the seasons are named after coils of metal.
Except Winter and Summer.
And Autumn.

People are going on about how the date 10/10/10 only comes once in 100 years.... umm doesn't the date 9/10/10 or 11/10/10 also only come once every 100 years?

I can't believe I got sacked from the calendar factory.
All I did was take a day off.

Fact of Life:
After Monday and Tuesday even the calendar says W T F

March 4th... I like today's date because it sounds like I'm telling people what to do.

They say that the world will be over in 2012 because that's when the Mayan calendar ends.
My calendar ends this December, should I be worried?