Man walks into a library & asks if they have any books on probabilities. The librarian says, "Most unlikely."

My wife likes to tease me a bit by always asking "Is it in yet"
I wish she would stop ordering obscure books from the Library where I work.

I was going to go to the library and ask for a book about 21st century technology and its impact on society.
Then I realised the library had been shut down due to lack of interest, so I Googled it instead.

Man goes in library & asks if they have any books on boomerangs. The librarian says, "You're in luck! This one's just come back."

A paki goes into a library and asks the librarian if they have a book about making people happy .
The librarian replies "Yes, try this book on suicide."

A man went to a library and asked if there were any books on marriage.
The librarian replies, "Yeah, it's just up the aisle."

Man walks into a library and asks for a book on ice-cream.
Librarian says, "Which one? We've got hundreds and thousands."

Went into the library today and asked the women if they had any books on diagnosing testicular cancer.
"Let me have a look for you"
That's what I call good service

A man walks into a library and asks "do you have any books with an abrupt ending?"

I went into the library and asked for a book about leprechauns, horse shoes, and rabbit feet.
"you're in luck" replied the librarian

Man goes into a library and asks for a book on Jade Goody's tragic death.
Librarian says; "We're eagerly awaiting the arrival of that".

my friend was on eBay looking for a book on suicide, you just can't get them anywere anymore

A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for a book on Paedophilia.
The librarian says; "Just have this boy - he asked me for a book on memory loss and he said he can't find his dad."

I really need to do something about my pimple problems.
I fell asleep at the library the other day and woke up only to find a blind guy reading my face.

I need to borrow a book on 'How to milk something'...
Anyone got any ideas?
Try your local library, I know a man who did!

I was in a newsagents, reading a magazine when the shopkeeper came up to me and said "This is not a library".
So I said, "Alright, I will talk louder then".

A man goes into a library and asks, "Have you got The Grapes Of Wrath?"
The librarian says, "No, I always walk like this."

A bloke walks into a library and asks for a book on braille and the man behind the counter says "This is a chemist mate".

I've burnt my library card as a silent protest.

I walked into a library yesterday and asked for a book on suicide to see what would happen. And what did I get? Six months of therapy three times a week. Thanks for the bright idea guys.

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on sarcasm.
The librarian says; "Yeah, 'cause you're gonna bring it back, aren't you?"

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on pessimism.
The librarian says; "Certainly, sir. There's a shelf over there, half full of them."
"It looks half empty to me," he replied.

A man goes into a library and asks for a book with a surprise ending.
The librarian gives it to him.

A Polish man walks into a library and asks ...
for a job.

I was in the library when my mate sent me the funniest joke by text.
So I replied, 'los'