Irony Joke

I don't see the problem with the NHS.
Probably 'cos I'm still waiting for my cataract operation.

Irony Joke

I like to try and have a good, positive outlook on my life
After all, knowing my luck it'll be over in a couple of years

Irony Joke

They all laughed at me when I told them i wanted to be a comedian, from then i knew my future was bright

Irony Joke

I was on a pub-crawl round town last night and I saw a young man wearing a T-shirt emblazoned with the slogan: "I fear no beer".
So I bottled him.

Irony Joke

If god doesnt have a sense of irony, how come the owner of the segway company fell off and died?

Irony Joke

Today my girlfriend told me that I was becoming rather nerdy.
So I falcon punched her.

Irony Joke

My wife told me she's leaving be because i never say anything to her face
Needless to say, the text i sent her when she left was an angry one.

Irony Joke

One of those injury lawyer campaigners distracted me today in town and I walked into a lamp post.
I'm now making him sue himself for me.

Irony Joke

Ironic - The only time you want your wife to open her mouth she "has an headache"....

Irony Joke

Whenever a group I like post something there's always a race to be the first to post and people always say "first"
How childish can you get?
And don't they know
first the worst
Second the best
Third the one with a hairy chest

Irony Joke

so animal rights activist who believe all animals shouldnt be harmed want to murder a woman for putting a cat in a bin?

Irony Joke

BBC News: Fears over paedophile's history
Well you wouldnt expect their computer to be filled with the nicest of things...

Irony Joke

The definition of irony
Risk, the great board game of war being invented by the Frenchman Albert Lamorisse.

Irony Joke

What is the difference between a market trader and a sausage dog?? A market trader bawls out his wears on the pavement..

Irony Joke

I was watching 'Worlds most dangerous drivers' yesterday...
On my in car TV

Irony Joke

My mate was going to book the transfer deadline day off work so he could watch Sky Sports News.
Then he realised he supports Everton.

Irony Joke

I'll never forget what my old grandad told me. 'If a story is worth telling, it's worth exaggerating'. That was just after he had single handedly won the second world war.

Irony Joke

I don't get when you see this "Please be aware all chat is logged for data protection purposes. "
Wouldnt it make sense, if you don't log the chat then there's not data to protect??

Irony Joke

I keep trying to convince my friend to use Google's Instant Search, but he is not moved by my arguments.
Jokes on him though. He is wasting on average 0.3 seconds of his life every time he searches for something.

Irony Joke

I always watch my films online.
That way I don't have to sit though those god-awful piracy warnings.

Irony Joke

Carlsberg don't make a decent beer. If they did, I wouldn't drink Stella and the wife wouldn't be nursing two black eyes this morning.....
....Probably.

Irony Joke

BBC: 'Sorry about this, there is a problem with the sound. In the meantime here is some music'
Oh the irony...

Irony Joke

Kinda ironic that a 12 year old boy will be performing at Michael Jackson's farewell ceremony

Irony Joke

I once said to my son, 'You never get anything in life for free'.
He laughed at me and said, 'What about that piece of advice you idiot!'
So I went over and took his wheelchair.

Irony Joke

a mate of mine told me i didnt get sarcasm then complimented me on my nice yellow teeth