I am tempted to create a Facebook account for my right hand just so I am not the only one from my friends that is single

Another Facebook fail;
Alexander:Just finished eating a raw chicken breast, no sweat. Looks like someone owes me $20.
*Cale: you're gonna die dude, salmonella for sure.
*Alexander: I ate chicken, not salmon, dude.

I just found a group on FaceBook called "I can't believe what this twelve year old girl was allowed to wear"
Facebook making paedophilia easier since 2006

Two men are to be jailed for four years after starting Facebook groups that incited riots.
Some people think that's too harsh, but I think it's right.
I reckon anyone starting a Facebook group should get at least four years.

Since the dawn of time man has been writing and showing pictures on the walls of caves depicting how they lived, what the weather was like, and what food was available.
Thanks Facebook for proving some things never change.

Facebook: The only place in the world where the word "Unlike" is used.

Why on facebook can you only have a Relationship status with one person?

Facebook chat has become so slow now Ive started sending my messages through the royal mail.

Facebook was forced to take its chat system offline this week for security reasons.
With all that poking you're bound to catch a virus.

Use Facebook for iPhone.
Just to make sure everyone knows you have an iPhone when you post a status.

Deleting your Facebook is like running away from home.
Your just doing it for attention and you'll be back in an hour.

I love it when people "check in" to places on Facebook through their smart phones.
It makes robbing their houses so much easier.

I really hate it when people make a facebook group from sickipedia jokes.
Become A Fan - Comment - Like

I've just seen a Facebook status:
'Finally after 6 years of trying, my wife has just given birth to a beautiful baby boy'
Blimey, she must be knackered.

If we all get our news from Sickipedia, how does it get here?

This actually happened on Facebook, I don't know the girl that commented but she should be made an honoroury sickipedian.
Isaac Richardson thinks it's sick that a status about crisps gets more comments than a status full of racism and hatred.
Megan Hudson-Prentice Yeah, I know what you mean. Racism is much funnier than crisips.

Facebook: the "toilet wall" of the internet.

Don't you just hate it when you're Facebook stalking a girl and pictures of her come up from when she was 12.
No, wait, who am I kidding...

In honor of all the oil-soaked birds, Twitter have announced that 'tweets' are now called 'gurgles'.

Being bored i decided to do one of those top5 quiz things of Facebook.
'Top 5 best comedians ever..'
1. Ted Bundy.
2. Josef Fritzl.
3. Fred West.
4. Peter Sutcliffe.
5. Ian Huntley.

Facebook doesn't represent an accurate cross section of society. When SocialInterview.com asked them "If you knew today was your last day on Earth, how would you spend it and why?"
Not one person answered "Go on a raping mission, because there'll never be time to catch me..."

Facebook: Proving that severe dyslexia is more commonplace than you think.

I've been flirting with a girl on Facebook for the last few weeks and last night we decided to meet up.
Looking at her with a very disappointed face I said, "You don't look anything like your profile picture."
She said, "That's my three-year-old daughter."

They are making a movie about Twitter. It's like the social network, but with less characters.

You know there's a new Hot Joke when everybody pops up with the same witty Facebook status.