I just saw the advert for Compare The Meerkat com saying that they are updating their server to cope with more people online.
Its been a bit quiet on the site today as many were present at the funeral of MAGGOT, Sickipedia's unfunniest comedian.
In tribute, the vicar read out one of MAGGOT's 'Knock, knock' jokes, and the congregation had two minutes silence.
My gran asked me for a website that's a good source of information.
Please, for the love of god, never EVER get Sickipedia mixed up with Wikipedia.
A man walks into a library and asks for a book on Maddie. The librarian says
"Sorry sir, that went out years ago and was never returned."
My wife spends a lot of time on eBay.
But no, I still haven't had any bids for her.
I'm feeling quite proud of myself after doing my bit for a worthy cause. I noticed a banner on Wikipedia this morning, saying that they desperately needed to raise $7.5m to keep the site running, but had only managed $1.2m so far. Thanks to me, they're now well on their way to reaching their target.
I edited it to say they'd raised $6.5m.
I must be really unlucky,
Every time I have an argument with somebody on the internet, they turn out to be a cage fighter.
Isn't it funny how people post so many sick and racist jokes on here, but still are civilised enough to put it in the right category.
Imagine if sickipedia had been around on 9/11.
The server would've gone down like- well, you can guess.
At the 'Sickipedia stand up comedy night' if too many people turn up are they going to put a sign outside the venue saying 'Database latency too high'?
Internet connection: 30
The look on your Gran's face when you tell her the difference between the Pope and Madeleine McCann: Priceless
Gran's funeral: 1000
There are some things in life which won't get you early inheritance: for everything else there's Sickipedia.
Sickipedia: Proof that giving Americans the vote in anything is a bad idea.
I'm selling a stalking kit on eBay,
It's got six people watching it...
I once got a joke on the left side of the Sickipedia home page.
I turned my computer monitor upside down.
So JamRags.com are printing all of the Sickipedia favourites onto t-shirts then selling them back to us? Personally, I'm waiting for the one that says "Database Latency Too high".
Mr Sachs, his daughter and 18,000 BBC viewers have labelled Jonathan Ross and Russell Brand "sick." Let's hope to god they don't discover this website.
I came across this on Wikipedia before.
'This limb disfigurement article is a stub. You can help Wikipedia by
Who said wikipedia has no sense of humour?
It has been announced that Nigeria has 22,980,200 Internet users.
I've had emails from every single one.
What do you get if you mix Barium, Neodymium, Tungsten, Silver, Oxygen, Nitrogen and Sulfur together?
A 'Periodic Table' joke about 'Ba, Nd, W, Ag, O, N, S'.
There is a lot of things wrong with the world these days but we do have some things to be grateful for.
Like you can't post photographs on this site.
You know you're sad when you find yourself hacking somebody's facebook so that you can invite yourself to their birthday party.
I wrote a 403 page essay about the internet.
There was another page but I can't find it.
I've just copied and pasted the barcode on Google's homepage, cut it out and stuck it to a tin of beans in Asda.
Should have seen the look on the checkout girl's face when she tried to charge me 32 billion.
People think the easiest way to success on Sickipedia is to think of a great joke that scores 1000 points.
I'm going to take the Poundland route, and post 1000 jokes that score 1 point.
Starting with this one.
Jokes leaving the 'Newest Today' section are a bit like the kids around my area.
If they're under 10 there's a good chance you'll never see them again.